How To Love Actually....

I went to BED last night with this familiar quote in my heart...."To love is to recognize yourself in another." ~ Eckhart Tolle. And woke up this morning trying to analyse how many people really understand what LOVE actually is, within the circuit of a relationship....Well, who better to give advice than someone like me who's ruined her chances a few good times, and learned the hard way. The actual way....

#1) Everybody WANTS love, but few ever achieve it, and sometimes those who do, don't CHERISH it until its too late.

#2) Most times we FAIL at relationships, because we don't have a GOOD relationship with ourselves....and we don't bother trying.

#3) Catching someone's eye is not having their ATTENTION, and sharing their bed is not sharing their HEART. You must know that by now.

#4) It takes two hands to BUILD a relationship.... With one, you can easily wave good bye.

#5) Everybody knows how to fall in love, oh it's pretty easy to TRIP and fall....but only a few people actually know how to STAY in love...Do you?

#6) Your partner should never have to COMPETE for your attention, make them PRIORITY, or 'lose' them to someone who will.

#7) Make sure the person you're in a relationship with, isn't just a friend who's CAPITALIZING off the 'benefits' you have available to them. And many do.

#8) For no relationship is all sunshine, but two people who are 'willing 'to share an umbrella, can SURVIVE the stormy weather together.

#9) Know where you've been and use it as a GUIDE to indicate where you shouldn't go. Make PROGRESS in love.

#10) Share not only your joy but your PROBLEMS with your partner, the more issues you can get through together, the CLOSER you will get.

#11) You can listen to promises.... but to avoid disappointment, trust ACTIONS, not words. Believe me, actions never lie.

#12) Sometimes the hardest thing to accept is completely CHANGING yourself for someone who wouldn't even 'bend' for you. But it's okay, for though love didn't GROW enough in their hearts to do happy that it grew well in yours.

#13) Be careful of just SEXUAL relationships, because soon you could give 'permanent' feelings to a temporary person, or a temporary person could want a permanent place in your heart.

#14) It's difficult not to look back at those we've 'lost'....But remember, not to CONFUSE your once upon a time, with your happily ever after....Focus on the FUTURE ahead.

#15) If you give up, it means you never wanted it. Truth is, LOVE never gives up HOPE.

#16) Having a Plan B = Lack of devotion to Plan A! COMMITMENT is forever. Stay Devoted!

#17) Know that SEX is the most abused form of affection. If you wonder why your bed mates confuse sex for love, it's simple. SEX is the most important form of communicating AFFECTION. Don't use it, if you don't mean it.

#18) Relationships are either ALL or 'nothing', make sure you're not exchanging your all for NOTHING.

P.S: Love the right person, or at least love someone who is making themselves RIGHT for you. Find arms that will HOLD you at your weakest, eyes that SEE you at your ugliest, and a HEART that will love you even at your worst. And whether you believe it or not....Love is ACTUALLY a choice. It offers you the option to choose. So VALUE yourself enough to CHOOSE someone who wants you, just as much as you want them....

But as my dear friend, Demele posted on his BBM this morning. - "If you decide NOT to choose....You have however chosen." Hahahah.

Have A Terrific Tuesday Lovelies! Kisses....

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