Great Sex withr Bad Romance...

Is it a coincidence that I stumbled on a very familiar caption I read 6 months ago in a lifestyle magazine which read "Great sex or bad romance?" Hmm...well, perhaps for the sake of my friend (Van) who just experienced the worst shag of her existence. I will share an old piece of mine...mind... Yet again. Lol. I needed to define romance.

ROMANCE (definition): "An ardent emotional attachment between people i.e love or a mysterious 'fascination' or appeal towards something adventurous, heroic or strangely beautiful."

With that in it is;

I remembered a few weeks ago I was talking with some friends, and one nicely asked in a swift manner if a particular ex of mine was a good shag. Laughing and not knowing exactly how to explain to him, cause my brain was mentally trying to digest the idea of him comfortably listening to me sexually describe another man, our mutual friend. I honestly wasn't sure how to answer the question.

Why? Well, I remember a number of times I was err...holding a few screams back...That's a good sign right? Not that I care the size or length of a man's tool just as long as he can use it efficiently to create ripples of sensation. (Abi u disagree?) But I do think a lot of my physical desire for him was a result of my emotional attachment to him and generally with anyone I date. So the days he was warm, kind and generous...I was wet n' willing n' screaming and the days he was a total jerk. I was completely dry as patched wood. Believe me when I say a few glasses of wine was my little aphrodisiac to pump me some excitement where he really wasn't creating any during those jerk days.

Hence my theory that woman really do navigate sex from an emotional zone no matter how sexually random, brief or platonic the relationship is, and men need to start understanding that to please their women. All women don't use the same manual, and so men need not lick n'screw us the same way without consideration for what we may each like differently.

R kelly sang "I don't see nothing wrong with a little bump n grind" well I absolutely concur. But the problem is that we seem to be getting too much bump without any grind. And they keep acting like sex is the freak'n olympics. If women had to come out honestly to rate sex with their men, there's bound to be a lot of broken egos splattered around the country's soil. I wonder how many women can't wait for the men to get the hell off them or how many had to fake a climax or how many that will never experience an orgasm in a lifetime or the magic o's who cum from creating their own imagery regardless of whatever's going on physically within their bodies. Or those who need drugs or stimulants to make up for the man's inadequacy. Hmmm...I wonder.

So I do a flash back and remember sometimes sitting across him in a meeting, looking at him and geting an instant jolt of electric chills down my spine, and I could see it in his eyes as well. (Yes! The rush). Painfully getting through the day and hoping for time when we could be left alone so he could put some magic on me. Pheww, and there comes the downer. Don't get me wrong, strokes were right n all but something was always missing. I'm sweating profusely from trying every freak'n' position possible even though we know where it all ends up for him...On all fours. Not begging me to marry him. Just him selfishly working my insides for his shot at a climax. Lol. He may be sometimes nice and ask "how do you want it?" But the problem started way from the top.

There you have it, 45 minutes, one orgasm and the show is over. And we are there laying on our bellies disappointed and wanting something more, our soul definitely left craving. We may have a pretty smile dancing on our lips and a worn out look after going through pummeling for an hour... but the truth is that, more often than not we are just putting up appearances to protect your ego because we don't want to hurt you. And then we hear you say? Did you like it? Did you enjoy that? Ofcourse Darling, we did (but it was such a long ass quickie what happened to the foreplay?) Lol.

What happened to tongue kissing us till we go crazy? What happened to laying soft feathery kisses on our forehead, neck, nose, ears until we drip wet? Did you know stroking our bare backs drives some of us crazy as well as nippling our ears or sucking our toes? (Don't roll your eyes) What happened to telling us we are beautiful, hot and sexy and whispering all the sweet nothings in our ears till we whimper with ecstacy. Who says playing some cool Al green, Marvin Gaye, Baby face or Banky W is old fashioned and boring?

And please we don't have to wear the title of "girlfriend" or "wifey" for you to treat us like a lady. If we are worth taking to bed then we are worth some romance too. What happened to dinning us and giving us some awesome foot massage? Maybe you could cook up a storm or do something out of the box romantic. Don't worry we're not gonna fall in love with you if your values don't match ours, but we will always remenber you as the gentleman who offered A-class romp every single time.

You could read us a little poem that you wrote, or drive down 3 hours to pick us up or tag a paragraph in a book that sort of reminds you of us. How about you leave your blackberry phone alone and focus on us?! Its our night remember and while we're having dinner, you could stop sexting your ex girlfriend or that business partner you've been chasing for the last 2 months. We don't want our likes to get caught up in a mix up. We want to be your sole focus, atleast for now.

Tonight is the night or today is the day. But you have to start thinking of Sex as your Art and us as your Canvas. We don't want nobody drilling into us like you are about to dig a 9 inch hole inside us. We already have one, how about you fill it up nicely and make us whole. Don't let your finger nails scratch our clit like you about to tackle some itch. Or chew it like you are chewing on some bloody meat. How would you feel if we did the same to you? And gave you some nice deep bruise on your dick?

Darling you have all it takes to make us comfortable so we don't have to worry our boobs are small, flat, too big or our belly is hanging out after 3 kids. Make us crave for you like we do our favourite pudding and leave us coming back to you for more.

I don't know where men got the idea that to differentiate random sexual hook ups from a basic love affair they should take out the romance. Seriously man, the fact that you want to hit that pom-pom everytime means there's an attachment somewhere. SEX is the deepest form of intimacy two people can share, so if you don't want to be romantic with everyone you hit with, then maybe you shouldn't be sleeping with just anyone. Dear Studs, women have been pulling on you some silent stunts. You honestly can't have great sex with bad romance. Drop the fences and let all the fireworks out! - Have a Terrific Thursday Lovelies!

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